Tag Archives: HEC

Heart On My Sleeve

Yes - my bleeding heart.

So, I wear my heart on my sleeve. Sometimes, I wear my sleeve on my heart but those times don’t really count. Here I am, at work, done with everything and waiting for the powers that be to put their fancy approvals on my hard work and my stupid soul. Also, with the state of the great and powerful force that governs this pure, pure land, one can never be sure what’s around the corner. Anything can happen.

The HEC has been devolved. Maybe I didn’t love their equivalence department so much because they were rude morons but eventually I got what I deserved. Now I feel bad about the whole thing. They’re still better than the rest. And what the hell does “devolved” mean anyway?


1. Pass on or delegate to another.

2. Grow worse.

Synonyms include: degenerate and deteriorate. Wow, really. Those are the words that define everything that is happening. But maybe I’m just depressed. Maybe something will make sense eventually.

I do realize that I took them for granted.

As for the esteemed organization where I work and bleed and sweat – well, what can I say? There is suddenly a complete confusion in the administration. Nobody seems to know who we’re under anymore. The devolution of most of the ministries has left usĀ suspended in a vortex of confusion and misinformation.

Coming back to my stupid bleeding heart: I trusted them all. I trusted the establishment to be an establishment. Or something. I trusted people – in the sense that they were like me and they actually wanted to work. I trusted the system to atleast provide the basics. I trusted that there would BE a system. I was a fool. I was naive beyond reason. Is this bitterness? Is this regret? I’m not sure. As a young assistant professor, what am I supposed to do? Who and what am I supposed to rely on? As an acting (well, I’m not sure if I am acting or if I am the real deal) department head, what am I supposed to do for my department? For my institution?

The only hope I have is as a teacher. I can let my students hope for something better. But would I be misleading them? This is my bitterness talking. I feel sick to my stomach. The powers that be, the great governance, the pure overlords – well, they can do whatever the fuck they want and all I can do is flail uselessly or stitch up my stupid mouth while my stupid heart breaks over and over again.



Inspired by recent events and a word learnt from a student.

A storm is raging outside and it completely reflects the severe calm I’ve been feeling all day. Ofcourse, that is after the storm that raged inside all day yesterday. My second contact with the Higher Echelons of Corruption damaged my brain. The complete and utter absurdity of their rules defies reason. Are they even human? No, they’re grass chewing cattle. In fact, even cows have higher functions of some value.

So there I was, harrassed in some man’s office (with help, ofcourse) and a man, slurping on his tea, claiming to have a million phds conveniently draped his simian arm on the couch – much too close to me. After five minutes of glaring at him (and that not having the desired effect) I proceeded to ask him (very nicely, ofcourse) to remove his arm because it was making me uncomfortable. That produced a kodak moment that I would have loved to capture with my camera but the opportunity to do so did not present itself. But it was effective and he was embarrassed enough to cringe and shove his expansive self into the other end of the couch.

A valid question, though, is: why on earth do they have couches in their offices?

After that, what could be worse? Well, there is no limit to how bad something can get in these here parts. So I was ushered into another office where a man repeatedly apologized for the lame policies they were applying to my case. I wasn’t too surprised. Enraged, yes – surprised, no. Apparently, you can get 100 bachelors’ degrees and still they will only count them as four years of education. You can get a million master’s degrees and it remains two years of education. The other degrees are just for fun. Or a shameful waste. Education is all about counting how many years you spent in school and then deducting all the special moments to leave some leftovers that dumbasses can understand. Like I said, even cattle have higher functions.

So that was my story. It took me a while to process it all. I went from moments of black rage to complete hysteria. And now I am calm enough to write about it. Why are they discouraging education? Or more specifically, why are they discouraging a well rounded education? It doesn’t make any sense to me. A very small percentage of the population even have higher education. Why would they not make separate policies for special cases? Why must they standardize? And who are these tea slurping apes with phds who can’t even talk or keep their body parts to themselves? Disgustipating indeed.

Higher Echelons of Corruption

I have been missing in action. I have my reasons. But after nursing a broken heart in vain, I am back with a vengeance.

The HEC (you can guess what it stands for besides the Higher Education Commission) has taken a dump on me. Being an educator and coordinator for education is gratifying at best but there are dark and evil forces that discourage education (higher or otherwise) at work in the dim backstage of academia that break my heart.

The reason I am ranting is personal. BeforeĀ I begin, it is important I think to explain why it matters so much to get things done and to do them right. The future of an entire race of Pakistanis is at stake here. I actually believe that. In all my naive honesty, I could swear by this belief. Integrity is an important word here. We need it more than anything. We need it to change the past, the present and the future.

So, to maintain a position where I can actually make a small difference and enforce a system that actually educates people, I require to prove that I am indeed educated myself. I have been in school most of my life and when I wasn’t, I was teaching school. I am an academic at heart and my soul soars when I learn something and pass it on. All that said and done, the proof is in a form of documents. Some of these documents are required to be of a foreign nature by the HEC to improve the standards of education in Pakistan. However, the Higher Education Commission then requires a local equivalence of the foreign degrees. This is redundant but I doubt the people who work there can even spell redundant so lets not burden them with the word. Besides this absurdity, they also count how many years you have spent in school and add them up to give you an equivalence for a Bachelors or Masters degree. Absurd. And they check up on you and look at your student visas in your passports. They require I20s where appropriate and other documents some people might have thrown away since they returned to Pakistan. Basically, they are ridiculous.

So, I had to subject myself to humiliation while illiterate people stared at my documents and stroked their bloated egos while they condescended and patronized me and kept trying to get me to grease their palms in a convoluted way that I could not understand at that time. I have never greased a palm in my life so I was truly at a loss. And how would you grease a palm anyway? Do you throw money at them, pass it under the table into their sweaty palms or simply just leave it on the table? I have no idea, really.

Ofcourse I paid an enormous fee at the cash counter for them to even process my application so I couldn’t have greased any palm even if I wanted. My wallet was completely empty.

Anyway, they eventually sent me a letter home that told me that I am equivalent to a undergraduate degree. They failed to see that I have TWO undergraduate degrees and ONE graduate degree. I suppose they just couldn’t read. And ofcourse I do not know anyone important. No government connections. No green number plates. I am a nobody.

Ofcourse I get to keep my job but I stay a nobody without this equivalence. I can go no further. I cannot really change anything. I envied a rickshaw driver today – whatever education he had or didn’t have – because it wouldn’t matter, you see. Those patronizing, condescending illiterates would never humiliate him. He’s lucky. He’s free.

My heart is broken. I cleaned vomit from floors, served tables and washed dishes for my education abroad. Before that, I fought like a madwoman to even go to art school, and tutored little brats to pay for my materials. And worst of all, I endured 4 years of business school with a heavy heart just for my parents and out of sadistic curiosity. How could they disregard my mad passion to be educated? Of course, they don’t care. Why would they? I have come to the conclusion that they discourage education altogether.

I am too honest and naive for this. But I don’t think I’ll give up too easy. They can bring it on, I say. The HEC can take a dump in my face, but someday I’ll bite them in the ass.